After buying all the ribbon and shit a few weeks ago, I finally finished one of the projects I bought it for!!!!!! I made a big cute bow for my Madara nui!!!!!!!!!!!!!


lookit him and his big dumb bow he's so cuuuuuuuuuute
It was very frustrating at times, because I'm actually terrible at making bows- this has been a problem since I was trying to make lolita outfits in my late teens and apparently I still struggle with them ;w; BUT I DID IT!!!! I conquered my fears and pushed through to make something adorable ♥

ALSO LIZ GOT ME A GIFT!!!!!!!!!


adorable kohamada pins!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They're so sweet *w* They're also playing the horrendous card game mini game that's part of FFVII Rebirth, because we needed more mini games????(We didn't) But it hits in the right part of their autism brain, so they've been having fun.

"I don't wanna shell out $50 for the next part of the FFVII remake" I said, fully believing the lie was telling myself.

Anyway.

I picked up FFVII Rebirth on Sunday and I basically haven't put it down since XD It's so much better than Remake it's honestly incredible; they very clearly took feedback into consideration with this one. The gameplay is tightened up and modified just enough that it's fun instead of clunky, and while I still prefer the traditional turn-based experience, this is massive improvement over the last one. I still think Crisis Core feels a bit smoother because it leans more into the hack and slash nature of it, but I'm not dying in every fucking fight like I did in Remake.

ALSO THE FEW SECONDS OF ZACK IN THE OPENING IN AN ALTERNATE(??????) TIMELINE GOT ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS. I think because I just finished playing Crisis Core it hit particularly hard, but holy shitttttt, I was about ready to cry ;w;

Cloud looks so good too, like...they really have nailed "anime spiky hair bullshit" mixed with realism...it looks so soft and fluffy and also well spiked. It's just. idk. It manages to nail a lot of the stylistic things that fell short in Kingdom Hearts 3, and while I'm delighted it did...it also makes me sad for what could have been in KH3. It was ALSO an amazing game, but I'm still fussy about the style changes between KH3 and literally every other KH game ever :T

MOVING ON!!!

For the first time in a long time, I feel like I'm playing a game that was made for the PS5. Besides Ratchet & Clank: Rift Apart, everything else I own for the PS5 is on at least one other system (usually a fair amount), because everything is made for every damn system now!!!! It makes it feel like.....why do I have this system if it's just like everything else on the market?

BUT NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FFVII REBIRTH FEELS LIKE IT'S USING THE FULL CAPABILITIES OF THE SYSTEM!!!!!!! And not just like, oh the graphics are fancy, isn't that enough? No!!! There are so many little details that pull it all together and make it a richer experience *w*

I have a lot of other thoughts about it, but tbh I just wanna go back to playing....


so here's a majestic picture of Cloud with a dolphin XD

( few more screencaps under here! )

OH ALSO!!!! We had to go out to get more food for Lumos, because she's currently on "only the fanciest food money can buy" for her sensitive tummy...which is definitely hitting us where it hurts (the wallet). But we also picked up some groceries, including this absolutely necessary ceramic figure of a balloon animal. What animal? I have no idea, but I love him ♥


I put him on top of the TV with my son who has every disease (the green pumpkin)
BACK TO MORE FFVII I have a mini game I actually like (rhythm game)~

First thing: Lumos is doing better!!! She's been eating more regularly today and we got her some new antibiotics...which she does not like, but she didn't throw them up. So I'm counting that as a win ♥

Now, let's catch up on the rest of my life, since the last few days with Lumos kinda drove everything else out of mind. I finished playing Crisis Core a couple nights ago and basically cried like a baby. Every fucking time I'm like "maybe this time it'll be different" even though I know it won't be. The nature of a prologue like this is to let the tragedy loom in the distance while every bit of the game fills you with such hope that you can't help but get swept up in it. But that's just it- Zack has to die so Cloud can become the protagonist, and it's so damn good ;w;

Seriously...I have only hazy memories of playing the original on the PSP back in high school. I mostly remember GACKT Genesis pulling a whole bunch of anime bullshit at the end, so I somehow forgot the incredible bit of plot integrating into the UI in the final fight. Holy shit it was good. That's the sort of thing that I love about video games; when the menus suddenly become key plot elements I lose it!!!! :D

Anyway, I now desperately wanna pick up the next part of the FFVII remake (despite not really liking the first one), but I don't wanna shell out $50 for it especially with how much everything with Lumos just cost sobs so...I'm replaying the original XD tbh I wanted the next part so I could finally get out of fucking Midgar and I didn't wanna replay the original because, well, Midgar. But I had a save file on the PS3 that's right before the final couple boss fights in Midgar, so I called that close enough and started playing it this evening.

AND I DISCOVERED SOMETHING:


YOU CAN CHANGE THE COLOR OF THE MENUS??????????????????
Literally I first played FFVII in 2004 and I somehow never realized this until today. Okay. I'm stupid XD This picture doesn't quite capture how pretty my color gradient is, but the PS3 doesn't natively take screencaps and I didn't feel running it through the capture card. Maybe another day~

In enstars news: I got both 5* cards from the jp tour last night!!!! I actually have enough whistles and event bonus that I can probably nab a second copy of each pretty easily, because apparently that's just what I do with year end tours in jp?? XD Whatever, I'm not complaining...I'm delighted to have more Rei and Tori cards.

Aaaaand a couple doujins + a small piece of merch came in the mail! Probably the next package from our jp shopping service will be the exciting one - new outfits for the nuis!! - but this one was still good :D

( more pics + enstars screencaps )

Anyway, I started a new community this week as well, because what good is stress if you don't turn it into making sparkle graphics? XD I'd been hoping for a freebie community to pop up on a DW because I didn't feel like I should be the one running it...for some deranged reason???? I ran a bunch of freebie communities on GJ back in the day, idk why I thought I wasn't qualified??? But talking with thewizardofoz about it the other day pushed me to ignore my nerves and just go for it!

SO!!! Now vogliaa exists, which is the name of one I ran on GJ. I held onto a bunch of old icons I used to use to post there + I managed to lift the profile from the wayback machine, so I had something to start with. The banners and layout coding are all brand new, tho the layout coding comes from someone who was very big during 00s-era of freebies/requestables. I think it looks very nostalgic and colorful and nice ♥

Everyone has been so nice about it so far btw ;w; I've gotten some really kind comments and it just reminds me of how much I love making icons, honestly. I know that it's a bit rose-tinted, but making requestables on GJ was such a formative part of my life...I know I wouldn't be who I am today if not for the community and friends I made there.

ALSO THE TEMPERATURE JUMPED TODAY FOR NO FUCKING REASON BLUH

uhhhhhhhhhhhh my brain is mush because I've been in the enstars mines all day (playing the jp tour) but I have many thoughts about the whole two (2) chapters of story I read XD I usually read the whole thing at once, but I couldn't help but jump ahead to the bit that's Crazy:B + Madara because...okay, because I'm a simple man, I'm always hoping for kohamada crumbs.


the boys were also here for Kohaku + Madara interactions, clearly
AND IT FUCKING DELIVERED!!!!!!! Yeah, it was only two chapters, but they had a ton of back and forth, cute snarky bits, etc etc etc ;w; Rinne now has a nickname for Madara - Mikeneko-chan - and it's so fucking cute!!! I'm so glad someone finally called him a calico cat in text, it's important to me *w* And then Niki said that Kohaku and Madara looked like cats together, which was so fucking precious. Like. Yes, please compare my faves to kitty cats, my day is made.

ALSO!!!!!!! Rinne told Madara that he has to prove his worth before he can have Kohaku back - which for the record isn't even why Madara was there, he just showed up and that was the first thing Rinne said to him XD - and it very much had the vibe of "you broke my friend's heart and I'm not gonna let you do it again" so like. VERY GOOD SHIP CRUMBS FOR MEEEEEEEE. This was followed by Kohaku being like "I can do whatever I want" which, again, gay????? SO GOOD.

HiMERU very clearly did not like that Madara was there and wanted him to leave. Which make sense with how dismissive he was of Double Face during Ephemeral Festival, but I like that Rinne was not and instead acknowledged that Madara is an important part of Kohaku's life...he's just a shit who needs to make up for wronging Kohaku.

gaaaaaaaaaaaaay ♥

And another thing!!!!! It opened with Madara pondering on Nice Arneb Thunder and thinking that him + everything regarding 4piece and his quick acceptance into ES is really sketchy. Which is 1) accurate and 2) hahahaaa I fucking called it, I just knew Madara wouldn't trust this dude!!!!!!!! I said this during the first 4piece tour last year and tbh Madara is one of (the only????) character who hasn't been immediately taken in by Nice's cult of personality charisma. Kohaku also seemed concerned about him after Madara showed up to question Rinne about his past, so like......there's still time for my crack theory to win!!!!! Double Face could still take Nice Arneb Thunder out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry not sorry I'm just having a nice time uwu


I ground through the tour quite quickly so I could get Madara's 4* ♥
Honestly, the tour setlist has been really solid so far!!! I just finished up stop 10 and it's been less than 24 hours, which is a lot faster than I've played any recent tours tbh. idk I'm just having a nice time? It's nice to enjoy things ;w;

I mean also Madara is in the event so there's a lot of MaM and Double Face songs, so I am delighted by that ;D

( more enstars-related screencaps in here )

Oh, right. I do have one complaint about the event. Two complaints, I guess? But they're related, so I'll complain about them together. There's no event song and no MV outfits ;w; I know that tours don't usually have either of those, but the year end tours usually do. I guess because it's the prologue to the next chunk of main story it doesn't? BUT I'M STILL FUSSY.

Just another reason to be mad at Nice Arneb Thunder XD

Liz thinks that the outfits are gonna be the 10th anniversary MV outfits that everyone gets, which, like...okay. That's nice and all, but I wanted year end tour outfits ;w;

AT LEAST I HAVE ALTERED AND MY FOUR COPIES OF TSUMUGI


and here's a Lumos for sticking around for this whole longass post!

I should have known Aira would come through for me. I had four copies of his rate up 5* during last year's big end of the year tour, and he definitely showed up this time!!!!!!!!! I had enough dia left to do another 10 scout, and......


TWO MORE COPIES, one right after the other, holy shit I did not expect that!!!!!!
Also I'm up to 2 copies of Rei in engstars and I should be getting a second copy of Eichi today :D Gotta stay on top of it if I wanna max them out~

Also I'm recording a bunch of MVs with Aira's new outfit so I can make more icons of him ♥ I'm just delighted to have him ;w; And the JP game will be down for 4 hours before the event starts, so I gotta prepare!!!


Aira looks like he's the girlfriend of some important yakuza guy (Kohaku) who's supporting his dreams ♥

I GOT MY BOY!!!!!!!!


HE'S SO CUTE AND HIM & KOHAKU ARE HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
My gacha luck has been so good this weekend that I'm like.....When Will My Luck Run Out XD

anyway it's after 2 am and I am wiped good niiiiiiiiiiight~

ALTERED IS HERE!!!!!!!

And it started with my phone crashing in the middle of one of the event songs, because apparently it hadn't charged last night? So that sucked XD I managed to get another chance to play it, but it was very stressful and also it made me feel stupid.

After I managed to get that sorted out, we went out for some errands! I accidentally made me and Pat crave &pizza, so we got that for lunch :D And then went to Michaels, because I want to make cute bows to put on the Double Face nuis (thx to some cute ones I saw on twitter the other day).

However, Michaels ended up stressing me out because??? bad brain day?????? fussy they didn't have any active coupons??????????????????? idk I just got really overwhelmed ;w; I did end up getting some cute ribbons and shit, but it was an oddly harrowing experience.

BUT I DID TAKE SOME CUTE PICS OF THE NUIS WHILE WE WERE OUT!!!! Here's one~


saw this tree outside &pizza and I just had to put the boys in it~ they look so cute ;w;
And then I got home and continued to have bad brain times for no fucking reason??? I tried working on crafting but just got frustrated, so I tried working on icons and that also left me frustrated D: So I gave up on being "productive" and played a bunch of Crisis Core, and that helped :D

Also, it gave me something to do while my phone was running a billion autoplay loops of the engstars event XD

IN THE MIDST OF THAT THOUGH!!!! I FINALLY GOT NATSUME TO RANK A!!!! Because I managed to pull his rate up 5*, he's getting fans in basically every song, soooooo it helped push him the last little bit of the way to 75k ♥ So, he's almost forgiven for gacha crimes (betraying me during the Halloween MaM event in jp and cn).


sobs it's been such a long journey...cannot believe I have four different idols to rank A now...
Other than that...I've gotta log into jp and cn even once today...I've been neglecting them in favor of eng, because I've been looking forward to this event for over a year. Also my head hurts ;w;

SCREAMING ROUND TWO!!!!


the way I literally screamed when he showed up, I did not expect his tsundere ass to make an appearance :O
So the Altered scout box went amazingly, lmao. I also got three copies of Tsumugi, because at least he knows how to be prompt and responsible.

uhhhhhhhh the livestream was great, the new character wasn't Kaname BUT he's apparently an assistant to Nice Arneb Thunder, aka sketchy dude extraordinaire. There's now a giant floating blimp above Ensemble Square????? The next bit of plot sounds insane, though I'm not upset. I love ridiculous things; I do love YuGiOh after all XD

OH RIGHT. ANOTHER FUCKING THING.


Madara is one of the cards in the end of year tour because he's a fucking attention hog and I hate him and I want to chew glass about him all the fucking time!!!!!!!!!!!!
There's some sort of magical girl transformation going on with this event/the next bit of plot????? Like. Uh. It's a lot. It's called "Main Story Mega Sphere" which even sounds like some sort of YGO bullshit...

ngl I love it ♥

Also I'm fuckin tired, so this entry is kinda all over the place :T

Liz and I are gonna watch the Element web anime with Alex tonight, because we wanna rewatch it and she hasn't seen it yet. And since Altered is starting tomorrow in engstars, it's well timed :D

HOLD THE PHONE


KANAME TOJOU?????????????????
Okay, look, I knew they were making announcements during the livestream "radio show" today, but I didn't think it was for real gonna be a new character reveal. Like. HELLO??????????? It's after 2 in the fucking morning, I was about to sleep, but now I'm just vibrating with excitement!!!

I KNOW I'M BEING KINDA UNREALISTIC BUT I WANT IT TO BE KANAME SOOOOO FUCKING BADLY, MY DUMB LITTLE IDIOT, I MISS HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sobs

I'm so normal about Kaname Tojou, I swear.

aaaghhhhhhh I just thought it was gonna be the new Switch MV outfits so imagine MY surprise when I saw this!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH I HAVE TO SLEEP SOMEHOW AND THEN WAKE UP IN LIKE 5 HOURS TO SEE WHAT'S GOING DOWN!!!!!!!!!!

So, after swearing off twitter, I ended up making a new account to be my side/enstars account...I just wanna look at pretty fanart okay ;w;


also sometimes it's nice to just lean into loving a character...I like my username, I think sakuraagawa is cute 🌸
ALSO SPEAKING OF KOHAKU!!!!!! He's the 3* in the new cross scout, which means I spent two fucking 10 scouts to get a single copy of his bitch ass. Like. Okay. I could use the rate up for the upcoming event, but I was kinda hoping to get to see who was on the other side of the cross scout first :T

I guess I shoulda known, since it took I think this long to get his last 3* from a box :T


this face is kinda how I was feeling after it took me so long to get him
So like...thx Kohaku XD plz stop being a little bitch, I love you ♥

I'm also just vibrating with excitement over Altered starting this weekend!!!! It felt so impossibly far away when I started playing - the cards weren't even available in the memorial coin shop yet in jp!! - and now it's almost here. It doesn't quite feel real ;w; I've been waiting so long~

not looking forward to Natsume betraying me in the gacha tho that's for sure

Anyway...I'm kinda hungry, so I guess I should do that instead of just fart around on my laptop XD